Shaks on the Move.............

Naam kya hai!!!

2008-10-06T11:33:00.002+05:30

I must admit that I am becoming lazy day by day or in management lingo rediscovering my true self once again. I created a folder, where I used to trash all my creative ideas in an attempt to let them ripe for the right moment. No point in guessing, that those ideas got buried. It’s ok!! It is never too late to delay it further.
One of the interesting things that has happened with me is my name” Shakun”. First thing anyone ask is what the meaning of your name is. Obviously you wouldn’t like to say it is as meaningless as your stupid question unless you have just seen Ram Gopal verma ki Aag. When my parents told me the logic of naming me Shakun, I couldn’t ask for more. Atleast, I can tell people, though my name does not have a meaning, it is very logical. It has some letters of my father’s name and some from my mother. By that logic, I could have been named Kush. But that’s what I call is fate.
The name Shakun could have been still OK but I found more black heads on mother earth with this name than males. It forced me to put my photo in Orkut with a clear explicit mention of sex, to prevent my mailbox from overflowing by unsolicited mails from love deprived descendents of Adam. I hate when somebody expects a female and I reach there to slaughter all their dreams. I see how their face turns from stud Imraan Hashmi to hopeless Mahesh Bhatt. It is a guilty feeling on my part.
Once, one of my friends called me to inform that there is another person on mother earth with same name as yours “Shakun Agrawal”, I immediately searched on Orkut only to find a female who stays in Buffalo, NY. I felt like scrapping her how dare you let your parents name you after me ;-). Alas she is older and she could sue me otherwise.
Forget all that! Anyway what’s in a name? I have kinda got habituated of listening to all those names ranging from Shakuni mama, mama, Shukrana, shakku to all those modern ones shaks( self proclaimed), shaky, shakki and the list goes on… I would always love to meet some guy carrying the burden of same name. It’s like brotherhood. I had one in my school but everybody doubted his manhood. I tried my best for that guy but God is all crazy. Anyway, I will meet somebody with the same name someday over a drink to philosophize him on name theory.
The most memorable murder of my name has been in a discussion with a guy from NA. It shook me when he pronounced me as SHAKEN. One I liked few days back when somebody wrote me as Shaun, I was really happy that he only missed K, if he would have missed AK then I wouldn’t have liked it at all. Sometimes, foreigners pronounce me as SHAH KAUN. I don’t hate it that much as it is only 3 letters away shah rukh. Lately, I got an appreciation certificate citing me as Sakun. ( At last found a place to write about it). While my name is getting butchered in all possible ways, I have become habituated to it all.
This is mostly my last post in this blog . I am finding it difficult to stop people from stereotyping my personality based on my blog. I will start one anonymously. That would allow me to write freely.

Indian Curry

2008-07-13T23:38:00.006+05:30

Whatever I am writing is my perception of Indians based on various encounters with different type of people. I am privileged to have friends in all parts of India.

East India

Bengali

80% bongs would have name starting with S, D or A
An average bengoli sings better than best of India
Smoking is a symbol of manhood ( or whatever, if you are bong, you gotta smoke)
You can get diabetic just by seeing them eating sweets
Bongs play safe. They are always worried about the train, plane reservation and would be the first one to reserve things in any aspect of life. They believe else it would be over.
If a Bong has just enough to fill his tummy and he still shares it with you whole heartedly, he is a true friend of yours.
People believe that bongs are not trustworthy “ I refute”
Females are dominant in bongs. Children are closer to mother than father. Females rule house.
Bongs are a very awkward body shape generally ( leave Bipasha Basu and other exceptions alone)
Bongs are excellent in arts and literature but does not have heart for business generally.
Bongs have very weird pet name, “tubai” for instance

Biharis
No respect for law. Everything can be bought
Intelligent to the core. But Mind work bothways constructive as well as destructive.

Oriya
Amazing culinary skills

West India

Marathis

Langoor ke muh me angoor applies well. 70%+ cases female would be more graceful in a couple
Tailors are obsessed with saving clothe. Most of the trousers would be short by 1 inch atleast.
They would study in a small college in chandrapur but wont go any other state, given a chance in a NIT . For most of them at most pune or mumbai is the end of India. For anything, Maharashtra is a end of India for most of them.
Unknown to India mine of beautiful ladies in and around kolhapur region. ( I saw one of the most beautiful female in kolhapur few years back)
Brinjal is one of the very common dish in marriages :-(
There are 2 types of Marathis

1.Learned, cooperative, appreciates art
2.Yede types, cranky

Gujratis

India's Saas Bahu viewership answer to Bold and beautiful viewers.
Undoubtedly, very high risk appetite
Gujjus mind works in all unpredictable ways to find out a workaround for any problem
Gujju's taste buds are mysterious. One end they love spicy food, on the other side they put sweet in many dishes.
If a Gujju spend a money on you genuinely, he is not a gujju.
They buy english news paper only to see rates of shares .Now a days they are glued to bottom most strip of television set
A strong community bonding

North India

Punjabis

Very happy go lucky culture
Pretentious to the heights. They can compromise on quality of life in trying to show other what they do not possess.
One definitely enjoy their company
somebody rightly said, 3 stages in punjabi female's life : baby, babe and baybay
They do not fear anything and can be found anywhere on earth

Hariyanvi

They believe in saying spade a spade, though it might not be required or might cause embarrassment
believe is not wasting mind so it remains untouched at times.
lively

UP

50% have traits to become politician. ( good density near Lucknow area)
No Dish is complete without Aloo and everything has to be fried.
They enjoys breaking rules.
Respect in language is paramount ( ji, Aap)
One person follows certain formula to become successful and everybody else follows it ( this tendency is higher comparatively)

South India
90%+ of Hindus would have name of God in their name

Tamils

Most conservative in India
Culture oriented
Hardworking job oriented
Only one word for good, great, excellent, marvellous and i.e. Super

They love watching age old chennai pics more than photo of a babe ( especially people from chennai)

Telugu

Most happening types in south India
Dowry is rampant
If you have not gone to a foreign country , you do not deserve to be called a successful telugu

Mallus
Rational to the extent that defeats pragmatism
Get along well with other people
Gulf may change its name of Kerala-Gulf soon

Kanadigas
A very balanced view
Cooperative and sensible

Though I have a long list of things to write about kashmiris, Chinkis ( North east) and rajisthanis and others but it could be biased as the set is small.

Anshu + Marriage + Orissa + ...............................

2008-07-13T19:46:00.006+05:30

While coming back from Anshu's wedding, we took a flight from Bhuvneshwer. Flight was at 10:40 AM. Now reaching airport is a pain as it takes 6-7 hours from Sambhalpur . We got a cab and started by 12:30. Punit was not in best of his health and his tummy was responding back to his gulping of countless samosas on the way to sambhalpur. Me and Ravi decided to sit next to driver alternatively, to keep him awake. I sat next to our man and exhausted all my possible list of topics to talk to him. last line of every answer would be "this is a maoist area". Though, We did not have any intention to scare maoists :-) , we were concerned for their problems. It was most boring journey, I was trying to keep myself awake and managed till early morning. Whole trip was like a flashback in my mind " train to jhasguda, playing cards, eating countless samosas, then playing again, sleeping, typical train journey, way to sambhalpur, anshu his family all rituals, a short trip to hirakund dam, dancing in the baraat, sudeepta and a loads of other things.

Morning their was a road strike and it was important for us to reach airport before 7 and we reached without any untoward incident. One thing we all wondered is the list of people not requiring security check. This list had a name of Robert Vadera. I do not understand who the hell he is to have that privilege. Ravi captured it well.

One incident I can't forget. I ordered water and the waiter got butter to our room. We had a good laugh over it. Many short stories of that trip in my mind, Some other time.

We were very careful in not calling him Anshu. Once, one of my friend called up Pankaj Lal. His dad picked up and this guy said" Uncle, Lal se baat karni hai" and uncle replied " Beta humare yahan sab lal hi hain kiss lal se baat karni hai :-)"

Ravi had a different perception of Orissa. He had seen a lot of oriyya workers in Surat textile mills. So he thought of Orissa as a very very backward place. while it is not that backward as the perception of Indians are. Only thing i can say is that we think in extremes most of the times. I would say that people migrate for better opportunities but it does not mean that they do not have opportunity at home at all. It is a choice they make and they pay a price for it.

Ratnagiri Express

2008-06-10T23:02:00.012+05:30

Life has been quite fulfilling now a days. This weekend added one more feather in my journey of life. I never knew I am so close to heaven. Such statements are generally known as global gas and I call them philosophical nonsense.

In plain words this weekend was chill. we visited ganpatipule. Though I wont mind writing a travelogue, but will skip certain parts and keep only the un”adult”Rated parts.

As usual, by the end of Friday night, I was in “seventh hell”. In the end ,I switched off my phone and reached home early by 8 :30 PM. I was so happy that security guard didn't ask me to sign in the visitors register.

I and abhi were determined not to waste the most awaited first weekend of rains . Yet we dared and wasted 2 precious hours in watching TV. By 11, we decided to go for a ride and ended up at ccd chandni chowk. By 1 AM after trying so hard, we could not sit at CCD. It sucks bigtime. Abhi was not in a mood to sleep. He wanted to go for trekking in Nashik . But we found out that it is still not raining enough in Nashik for insane people to trek. Now what next, Abhi called up “Goa” Raju. He along with “foodie” sohal and “Sarkar” Mhatre came to my place from a late night show of Sarkar Raj. We somehow arranged for all the drinks by 2 and had some good timepass at Goa's place.By 3:30 AM we were deciding for a place. “Goa” Raju was advocating for Goa and Kashid, me for “ratnagiri” and Mahabaleshwar, abhi for mahabaleshwar and kashid, Sarkar for lonavala breakfast. Now foodie's decision was crucial.

At last after endless discussion, we decided on Ratnagiri ( Ganpatipule). Next 15 minutes we wasted in deciding on car “ Ikon” vs “ Santro”. After a deadlock we tossed a coin and decided on Santro. Santro had a good music system and that's what is more important than space of Ikon. In 10 mins we put very few clothes and By 4:15 AM, we left pune. As we touched highway, it was pelting water. On one end, Raju was driving full throttle at 130-140, on the other sarkar and foodie were in deep sleep. In the background, we had some good beats keeping us energetic. It was beautiful outside. We saw some amazing early morning sceneries in the hills of Satara. We passed one wind farm on the way. One scenery was very similar to downtown US atleast with the kind of music, people and surprisingly roads too. The life was treating us good and that could be the reason that it was drizzling all the way. We stopped at many places to see flavors of nature. At one ghat, we were driving through the clouds, at a landscape we out”wet”ed rains, had breakfast in a shack with gentle breeze kissing hairs. We reached Ganpatipule by 11 AM.

It took us around an hour to find a place there and then what next!! We all were dead for 3 hours. Didn't sleep yaar last night. By 4PM Saturday, we got up, and by now all of us were terribly hungry. We went to MTDC restaurant and had 10 rounds of snacks coming. Once filled till head, we went to beach. It is a nice beach, though bit dirty because of rain effect. We walked on and on the sand. Camel ride was fun, as the trajectory you take while camel stands up is better than many of the rides of essel-world. We lied down on beach and our talented foodie crafted a female body using sand. It was so real that we couldn't resist the temptation of having her clicked with all of us . We crashed on beach and had some nariyal pani and left the place by 7.

We rested for a while at our resort and went to krisha place for dinner. It hosts only bar in Ganpatipule. We had dinner and “Goa” drove us to a hill overlooking sea. It was one of the high points of the trip. Some soul wrenching music along with sound of the waves in the deep darkness to night. That moment is frozen in my mind. It was indeed a special night . It was all silence out there expect the waves and Sarkar who was busy explaining his G.F. That night had so much of life into it that one could only spoil it by writing about it.

We all were very tired and went dead till next morning 8:30. Next morning, It rained like anything. The first thing we saw from window, was class apart. We all were charged up to get wet. Alas we were not carrying enough clothes. But who cares, somehow we managed. We had a good bath at beach while rain betrayed us and didn't shower us . After sometime we got freshen us at room and checked out. By that time we were out of cash and need to withdraw. Bank of India ATM was not functioning. Me and Sarkar left for another ATM which was in temple premises. Although we didn't plan but me and sarkar wanted to go to famous ganpati temple. What more than this opportunity, we visited the temple, had a darshan of Ganpati and also withdrew the money.

After our breakfast at 12, we left the place. We also did some small shopping and all . We took chiplun route while coming back. It is another very scenic ghats that we pass though Chiplun. It reminds me of my visit to chiplun and marleshwar 2 years back. We came through few cool sites with so much of nature. One of the city moment of success ( too much of IPL na) was awaiting us on the ghats of Karad. It was 2:30 and we all were damm hungry. There was no hope of getting anything in ghats till we got a stand alone “valley view” restaurant, overlooking a valley perfect for paragliding. Chilled air waves were openings every pour of the body and putting mind into wallpaper mode. We asked the guy to serve us in open next to valley and convinced him to do so. That place was some place yaar.

We started by 4:30 to karad. By the time we reached Satara, we were out of cash and need to put long hand into our pockets to get some chiller for tea. You must be wondering why I am writing so much about food and eating. It's all because of our own “foodie” Sohal whole examples are even foodie “Car got sandwiched”

By the Way, “Goa” Raju's dream is still unfulfilled. To cheer for Portugal( EURO cup) in Goa. He has bought a Portugal T-shirt for it. We couldn't convince “Sarkar” Mhatre that Rajeev Masad is a good critic and Sarkar Raj is a flop . Foodie wanted to kill us for keeping him hungry for most part of the trip. Abhi is still in earlier Goa trip hangover and not ready to listen anything other than Trance. Me, as usual.....

Life treats so well on weekend that it takes away all the hardships one does on weekdays. Weekday!!!! what. Oh no!! we are back and tomorrow is a working day.

Hum nahin sudhrenge!!!!!

2008-05-18T16:32:00.004+05:30

I do not have any contribution of my head in decision making and most of my decisions are governed by my heart. Although it is crazy, But I can’t help it.

Extremes:

Watching 2 movies back to back in 2 different movie halls, eating whole day out in all good restaurants, 3 days before the exam. After that left with money just enough to buy cold drinks or reaching back to hostel. Preferred cold drinks and walked 5 kilometers.

(Can be a better idea for cold drink ad than “Mein youngistaan se aaya huin”)

Drinking water from a pond full of toads and cooking food using that water in a jungle full of bears.

Walking/trekking, 18-20 hours, in a span of 24 hours, covering 34 kilometers around, eating half a meal, sleeping for an hour under a plastic sheet when it is raining.

(Unforgettable, it freaked me out)

Working 70 hours in a week for my current job while working same number of hours in in an year in my first job.

(Sometimes you feel you were better off without MBA)

Not sleeping for 48 hours and sleeping 40 hours in 48 hours

Walking down the road at 48 C in Chanda and taking bath in almost frozen water in the month of December in Delhi

( Majboori ka naam I don’t know)

Down with heavy fever, took medicine and about to sleep. Frns came for L-square party. I went there, drank and danced whole night

(Party and frns ke liye aapun kuch bhi karega. Needless to say, Aftermath was terrible)

Watching LOTR all 3 parts back to back

Blackmail:

Blue color: For me, there are only 2 types of colors in world, Shades of blue and others
Water body : If there is one with clean water, I am gonna jump into it

Mine this year resolution was to restrict myself from buying anything blue, till now only partially successful. Water bodies, still can't help.

Fundas:

Every road leads to somewhere which goes to someplace. So chilax!!! You will reach somewhere for sure.

Money is to spend. More you spend; more God will give it to you.

Would you like somebody to do it to you? If not, then don’t do it to others.

Can't help it :

laptop on floor. Newspaper on laptop. Sleepers on top of newspaper struggling with I-Pod to find its place. On top of everything, a book on templars (Not intentional but it just happened).

Problems:

Convincing our maid that we are sane human beings and this bed sheet can still be used for 15 days atleast. But she does not believe in water conservation :-)

Finding a pair of ironed clothes every morning. If there is none, I feel harassed by “Iron man”.

Participating in social discourse over petty issues such as “ Barabar waale sharmaji” or “ roads of delhi/pune ” or “ Unka ladka or ......................

Convincing self on Monday morning that Saturday is before eternity.

Saying people “NO”

Innovative ways to get fired

2008-05-16T20:31:00.000+05:30

Forward your Dept head’s photo to all your friends asking to forward it to 10 more people and they will get promoted else bad luck will follow them.

If someone senior is bugging you and gives you an opportunity to ask a question, ask “Melody Itni chocolaty kyoon hai!!!” and “Log cloromint kyon khate hain!!!”

Play Akon’s “I wanna F*** you” in a con call”.

When some senior guy uses too many unnecessary jargons, tell him” Please talk in English, I am new to Greek”

Send a pic of office broken tiles to company’s distribution list with subject line “Recession is hitting really hard”. To make matter worse, put ur bosses id in cc. To make matter even worse, don’t send the pic in first go and send a follow up mail to everybody with message “forgot to attach”. Better and quick results can be achieved by marking your HR also in cc.

Don’t wash your socks for a week, beautifully gift wrap them. Needless to say don’t forget to put your name on the gift.

Some Crazy Ideas :-)

Dil Dosti etc : Circuit Tales

2008-04-29T19:01:00.007+05:30

Sometime back one sudden impulse of excitement forced me and pammi to convince “paji” and “circuit” for a long ride after midnight. While the reason that “wahan pe crowd aacha hota hai” does not work after midnight, convincing becomes too tough a job. Yet we succeeded. Night Safaris are always fun but added fun was that circuit was sitting behind me when he got update call from his fiancé. “Update call” is the typical phone call that lasts for 55 minutes and gives you 5 minutes time to elaborate those 5 minutes in next 55 minutes. Typically, after getting engaged before getting married everyone has to pass through this “agni pariksha”. Bechara!! I can only listen to one side of conversation

“Arre mein socha tum so gayi hongi”

Me wanted to say ( MWTS) “Oh to circuit sochta bhi hai”

“ Mein tumhe disturb nahi karna chah raha tha”

( MWTS) “ Kitni fikr hai saale ko, jhooth bol raha hai”

“ Arre kuch nahi abhi ghar se niche utr raha huin”

( MWTS) saale 10 minute se to mein drive kar raha huin”

“ arre yaar ye dost logo ke saath abhi khana khaya tha”

( MWTS) khana 2 ghante pehle khaya!! Phir CAD-B khaya, phir saale kitna timepass kiya”

“coffee pene ke liye ja rhein hain”

( MWTS) “ Wah Wah!!”

“ haan, coffee hi pene ke hi liye ja rahe hein yaar”

( MWTS) “ Sach bhi hoga to kaun manega”

“ Aawaj, haan bike pe hain na, isiliye aawaj aa rahi hogi”

( MWTS) “ ab to tu gaya beta”

“ yaar vo raat mein coffee milti nahi na aas pas, isliye station ja rahe hain“

( MWTS) “ Coffee pene raat mein station, bike pe, ye baat kuch hajam nahi hui”

“station pass mein hi hai. 5 minutes mein pahuch jayenge”

( MWTS) “Class hogi saale ki aaj to“

“koi ladki nahi hai yaar!! Saare ladke hain. Mein huin, ye hai, vo hai.........”

( MWTS) “ Nahi kar payega tu convince, kaun manega”

“Raat mein ghumna awaragardi thode hi hota hai. Hum log kuch kar thode hi na rahe hain” ( It was really cute one)

( MWTS) “ direct dil se, but kaun manega, u cant change social perceptions”

“ Aacha theek hai, mein ghar jaakar phone karta huin.”

( MWTS) “ Ye to Gaya kam Se”

If she would have been his GF, we could have used “Be a man” to remind him that he is a man and nobody has right to challenge his manhood but aab shaadi ki baat hai to kya karein. Bechare ki class ho gayi faltoo mein. When we came back, ek ghante tak convince kar raha tha. While he was about to succeed, he entered the room. Phir kya tha ek aur googly maari hum logo ne. Started speaking loudly “ Kya capacity hai yaar iski, 15 mins mein do bandiyaan pata leta hai”

Phir kya tha class shuru“ Arre yaar aisa kaise possible hai, tum hi batao, koi 15 mins mein do bandiyaan kaise pata sakta hai, ye log mazak kar rahe hain” He was about to say” saala 15 saal mein baandi nahi pati, nahi to love marriage hi na ka leta” Kya kare lekin phir saale ki class shuru.

We call him “Circuit” since 1999, long before Munnabhai got released. Overall he has changed for good after getting engaged. We all are very happy for him!!

Happy Fool's day

2008-04-01T21:13:00.010+05:30

If you die while sleeping, are you being deceptive?

Is Not being selfish, a selfish intention?

If you cry in the rain, are you faking?

Baby, dont hit one more time

2008-03-25T20:02:00.004+05:30

Lately I got a disheartening letter from Limca Book of Records. Sometime back I applied for a record of maximum number of accidents in a lifetime. To achieve this milestone, “I tried so hard and got so far but in the end it doesn’t even matter”. The letter states how badly I am doing. In last 4 months, only 3 accidents. That too not a single major accident. A major accident includes 1 fracture atleast.

But there is good news also, they may give me the award for generosity because at all the 3 incidents I got crashed trying to save people/ animals with their eyes at the back of their head. I am not talking about atypical aliens of Hollywood movies, with tentacles coming from all unexpected parts of body and green color skin. These are human beings with this peculiar deformity in which they can only see themselves and believes all the public resources are their “baap ki jaidad”

My Last accident was class apart. This small baby with god given deformity started crossing the road in an attempt to woo a small girl (“Boys” style, my frns dubbed it for me). Now it was my prime responsibility to let that guy get his love and save him from this “Pyaar ke dushman duniawale”. I skidded to save him. That’s when I hate all these bike commercials, they never show the face of the stunt performer so you can not make out how many performers were hospitalized in the ad shoot. The sight of that baby hugging the baby (female wala baby) took all my pain away. I never knew life is so filmy at times in Yashraj style.

Somehow with the help of the remains of my bike, I reached back home. My heroic attempt to save the child made my bones Jagran and Kirtan whole night. My 1500 bucks trouser became a 15 rupees cleaning cloth third time in a row. My wrist watch made me to go to this showroom lady who believes that I break my watch myself in order to meet her. I am sure, the way things are going, I would be paying EMI’s for a bike which I won’t have.

Kissa Kursi Ka

Atlast, Me and Abhi managed to go for swimming. We were having a gala time till we heard some tortured souls of a “computer wala company”. They were using H1, L1 and B1 as codewords of a top secret mission to US. We couldn control to ask them “Can you help us in booking the movie tickets in E-Square” We hit again “ The way you were saying H1, L1 and B1, we thought you book tickets in cinema halls at nominal charges”

Deleted ( Guess what!!!!!)

To John With Love

2008-03-12T18:55:00.000+05:30

I dont know the author, I got it from John in 2005. Only forward which I kept. It is more relevant today than it was. This forward is dedicated to all my frns getting married soon.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John Jacob
02/10/2005 07:22 PM

To:
cc: (bcc: Shakun Agrawal/INFOCOMM/RIL)
Subject: Here I'm
Importance: Normal Sender’s OU: Reliance

The brown official-looking envelope I received by registered post that day had my degree certificate in it.’ Bachelor of...’ it announced in somewhat gaudy letters as I stood smiling. Bachelor!

Till then I was a boy, a brother, a student and whatnot -- but not a bachelor. All of a sudden, that important piece of paper had given me a new identity.

I know you are dying to tell me things like 'this bachelor is not that bachelor', but believe me, the very next day my phone rang. It was my real-estate agent, an uneasy reminder to the approaching expiration of the initial company accommodation. "Sir, you are a bachelor, are you
not?"

"Sure, I am," I said, almost adding, "and now I have proof of that, if you need."

"Sorry sir. The owner is not willing to give the house to bachelors. But don't worry, sir, I have many other houses. You see..."

So that's how it is. No country for the people of Palestine. No food for starving Somalis. No trees for migrating birds. And yes, no houses for poor bachelors.

They are not welcome in residential areas. Bachelors party and make noise round the clock. They go after the neighborhood girls. They don’t respect the norms of the colony. They come in groups...

Anyway, I learnt my lesson: Bachelors don't have all the civil rights that 'normal' citizens enjoy. But then, what do we have that makes many a married guy cherish the memories of his long-lost bachelorhood?

Palestinians have to cling to their land. Migrating birds are bound by directions. But a bachelor has few restrictions. Except for renting an apartment and walking into one those stupid 'couples only' clubs, he can have everything else.

He gets up at any time and sneaks into the office unnoticed when others get ready for lunch. He sits to almost any time in front of the computer without worrying about anxious where-are-you calls. He stays away from the house for days and no questions are asked. He does whatever he wants on the weekend, in the company of his friends...

Yes. Friends are the most important aspect of any bachelor's life. Without them he practically has no existence, especially if he's staying away from home.

But then one day, over the thundering music and the first round of cold beer in a dimly lit pub, he announces his plans to get married to this cute girl that someone else had found for him. Over the double cheers, the naughty comments and laughter, I become aware of something that hurts me somewhere. My friend's getting married. Of course it's something to celebrate. But then, that also means he's leaving the gang!

We attend his wedding, the most colorful function of his life, in full spirits. All of us. We give him gifts, wish him good luck and retreat to our good old world, one member less. It does not take much time before we find him reduced to much-delayed replies to our bunch of mails -- and as for phone calls that comes only once in a blue moon.

For my part, I watch the pile of wedding invitations in the corner of my desk grow at an amazing, alarming pace. Before I know it, most of my cool buddies are gone. And the rest of us soon realize that we are not always welcome to the new circle the married men have formed. So we seek solace behind those office doors where the
sun never sets.

I do meet my married friends occasionally. In the office, on a casual walk, or in a busy restaurant. They are my friends still. And they are still friendly as much as their new lifestyle and added responsibilities permit.

But...
Oh heck, there's my telephone. I think it is my real-estate agent again.

Swayambar

2008-03-06T17:13:00.002+05:30

Setting: Kamath’s at JM road, Sunday Noon

Genre : U decide

Actors : Me, my friends and extras

Action: Coming back from Kalyani Nagar, I and my friend decided to have brunch at Kamaths. Life’s one of the problems is to choose what to eat from a Menu. So we started playing musical chairs and passed the menu till one decided we will go for some usual tried and tested stuff. On the table next to us there was a drama going on. One end there was a guy and his parents and on the other hand lady and her parents. I never knew that the next 30 minutes are going to entertain more than usual comedy movies. The lady to the gentleman “What is your long term goal?” And we started laughing. If I would have been there “my long term goal is to become gangster. Our son will run the show in Latin America. I will keep Paris Hilton as a maid for him and George Bush as a cleaner, Oprah Winfrey as teacher LOL” I mean what is the significance of long term goal. In my 10th standard, I wanted to become doctor, 12th , head of operations; engineering, scientist in AI; job, fin guru and MBA, entrepreneur and so on. With so many changes already I might end up becoming someone I never thought of. Obviously, everybody likes to do something good in long term but at times we don’t have control over circumstances. This question baffles me.

Coming back to the point, the guy was answering everything with such composure as Sachin is to sledging. I am not favoring that guy but that particular girl looked finicky types. Given a chance she would have asked him to show how he would escape “belans (That cylindrical thing which hits really hard)”. After so many rounds of police enquiry, the guy and gal were left alone. And when they joined again, the guy’s face looked as if his parents have caught him at Bandstand. The show continued and we left after some time.

I had one more such experience. One of my friends took me to accompany him to face the “battle of Bangalore”. Ya that’s how I recall it. Only motivation for me was to go and grab a free lunch in a good hotel. But I regret it till now. The gals parents asked everything to my friend other than asking him to pull his shorts down. I mean it was embarrassing. To be sure that you wanna right guy for your Sita types gal (who never dated vibhishana), you can’t put a guy in front of Ravana and expect him to behave like Ram. (Ravana is metaphor for nonsensical questions and so on).

(Swayambar: the reason for title is so many dishes to eat in Menu and we can choose one among them, kinda Swayambar na.) Please don’t try to find any second meaning into it!!

Trash

2008-03-06T10:13:00.000+05:30

"One of the symptoms of nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important" Karthik’s status on Gtalk.

“College ke is taraf hum duniya ko nachate hain, aur us taraf duniya hame” From RDB

I would have done better as an artist, sociologist or art director. I don’t want to finish as just another XXX in some IT company. Don’t know the path yet.

So many things going in my mind. Good thing none is related to work, bad thing I don’t have time to pursue.

It takes 2 days to come back to your normal self and 1 hour in office to feel something is wrong with you.

Westerners understand the importance of work life balance. Indians have too much of “achievement motivation”. Misplaced!!

I took MBTI again and my personality type (INTP) came same again after 2 years.

Whatever job you do (However fundoo), once you know it, it is all the same. Research could be an exception but if it is not applied research, what’s the motivation? If you can’t change life of people, does it make any sense, it is abstract. I am nothing against it, just wanna say, it is important to enjoy whatever you do, nothing is extraordinary in this world.

I meet this guy every weekend. I hate him to the core. He shows too much of unnecessary atti. He reminds me of Bobby (not deol, but chakka, bollywood fame)

The only reason I removed counter from this blog because I don’t want to face I am the only reader.

Today seems to be a chill day in office. Hope so!!

Top of the Mind Recall

2008-02-29T18:33:00.000+05:30

John Lennon

Undoubtedly he was the best singer. But, I like him more for the way he lived his passion, the way he did what he wanted to and the way he pursued his life in his own way.

Mirza Ghalib

He used power of Urdu and mixed it with the strong emotions in an elegant way. His lyrics cut through soul.

One can find 0 Feet and 100 Feet meaning in the same lines. Ex. is below:

“Hui Muddat ke ghalib, mar gaya par yaad aata hai, Vo hare baat pe kehna kai yuin hota to kya hota”

Johnny Depp

I rate him best actor of all times ( Full Stop) The way Captain Sparrow walks will be the talk of acting books in the years to come. I am waiting to see Shantaram. He is the only guy who can enact that character.

Shashi Tharoor

I respect him for his penetrative thinking and persuasive language. He is the copy book perfect diplomat. I would love to see him as primeminister of India.

Mahatma Gandhi

It is kinda fashion to crib Gandhi. What ever people say but you can’t take away the fact that he was the one who populated Ahinsa as a fighting tool.

last 2000 years on mother earth, how many non violent movements took place? How intense they were? What was the overall impact?

Ritu Beri

I hate when people ask me who Ritu Beri is. She is the face of new Indian woman independent, smart, forward looking and what not.

Her creations are simply superb. Till now couldn't buy anything other than a pullover from her creation but if get a chance ( miracle happens), I would only wear her creations.

Unaided Recall Next Time ( Keep Smiling)

Digital Shutter Mania

2008-01-30T15:12:00.000+05:30

“Arre yaar is pose mein le !! acha ayega, orkut pe lagana hai !!”.
(Please read first statement in conjunction with second)

All the camera companies should share their revenues with Orkut. Today, major reason people wants to take snaps is to put in their Orkut profile. Orkut bug keeps on pressing one for a camera, especially on finding your friends’ inability to capture you in George Clooney pose. (Pun intended). At times people enjoys taking pictures more than the place itself because it is of utmost importance to show others that I visited Jhoomri talialya and my snap taken over there had put Brad Pitt out of business. At the end of their lives, these photogenic characters will leave a lot of options for Spielberg (pun intended) to choose for the frame, a small but powerful role.

Let’s not forget person behind the shutters who believes for every snap that this snap deserves a place in fortune 500 list of photographs (Oh ho ! Pun intended). Nobody understands the plight of that guy, how he has graduated from the “Say cheese” days to “abstract makes perfect sense”. All these guys are in so fond of shutter box that they do not get the feel of sightseeing from naked eyes. Once all possible “Taj Mehalish” type photos are over, which can never be the case, their eyes rolls on to find that it’s all over. I have a cool idea for these souls to have their cameras in time set mode before leaving the other end of shutter, world.

Going to foreign location for Honeymoon and posting 100 photographs of each place has become a trend sort of. These couple forces you to suspect whether they did anything else on Honeymoon at all. I can anticipate their answer to “What did you do on Honeymoon?” We clicked, clicked and clicked till we could click. (Hey man, pun intended!!)

In short, in every sphere of life I meet people who are busy in making up a life that they never lived. Let’s live life and leave it on others to capture it.

And then there are people who use “pun intended” to make sure that their differently- abled readership understands the brand new breed of PJs (pun intended).

Dry Martini shaken not stirred

2008-01-29T21:04:00.001+05:30

Now when only 18 days are left for this year's second secular festival, preparations are in their final round ( wondering what was the first, the day on which only sweets lover goes to school to get 15 days old boondi.) Times of India reporters have already started collecting statistics of condom sales in Ahmedabad to put it as a cover story. The condom statistics have already triggered maternity hospitals to plan for using there premises for other purposes during few (festival +9) months of the year.

These TOI guys lack creativity and genuine information to report. Like a poll on how many guys were successful to put a flower in an overfilled hand (just like god's idol), how many got slapped because of bad breath, average number of flower vases girls were able to fill, scarcity of water in the city to keep those flowers, city by city comparison and what not. On top of that they have bacchi karkaria, Jug suria and shobbha dey to write perfect non sense in the most sensible language. Still one pat article after every festival will be on sale on condom in Ahemadabad. May be, TOI staff works in any condom factory.

Leave these journalists aside, our “bhartiya snaskriti ke rakhwale” shivsanik and bajrang dal also celebrates it in their own way. On valentine day, it is their unconstitutional (un is silent) right to take personal revenge. They can catch anybody, beat them and tell them “even if you are not a pair but you would make a good pair that's why we took this proactive stand.” If a little bit more freedom is given to these guys, they will get all the married people divorced in a “single” day. But every year they face a problem. Unlike other festivals, on Valentine day they do not have anybody in particular to burn effigies of. Probably they can burn theirs as they are one, creating maximum nuisance. This year, they are working day and night to prepare a list of all enemies. Isn't it a good idea, propose a girl on valentine day, if she goes with somebody else, join Shiv sena and beat that guy up next valentine day only to know that now that Kanya is going around with a Bajrang dal guy.

Gift shops are gearing up for their most happening event. They have so much to do, increasing prices of everything by 50% at least, changing pricing tags and cleaning last years leftovers so that they look like new. Few parties are helpless this year too. Like Cinema- halls still struggling to have more corner seats, restaurants, cafes trying to have more 2 seat tables, pubs planning to throw away “2 beer whole night type couples”

For guys this is the most crucial weekend and let me not waste anymore time writing and try my luck. I think there is enough time to blossom this valentine day. Let me start with a pub ;-)

(Penned on last Saturday)

Typifying females ( From Guy's point of view)

2008-01-06T12:55:00.000+05:30

I decided to write something on females since I wrote “ Type of Guys”. It took me so long in an attempt to understand fairer sex. At last I realized, they are pretty complex character and a female can not be typified in any one category. They show all the following characteristics but degree defers.

Girl

Most of the time of their early life females behaves like girls. Girls generally show as if they are seriously into whatever they are doing. At the sametime, they are very conscious of how am I looking today. Your answer to that question can never satisfy her as she still feels that most nerdy guy in the block is yet unmoved by her dressing. That's what we call as striving for excellence.

For guys this is the best period to talk to a female as she genuinely tries to listen unlike other avatars. But your success depends on your impression in her frnss minds, not in her mind. I know it is a kinda vicious circle because in an attempt to woo her friends, you might loose her.

Babe

Almost all young females would like to be called babe but very few of them are able to carry the attitude of a babe. Babe is smart, bindaas and casual avatar of a female. It's the temperature that decides whether a female is a babe or just another girl.

To identify a babe in a party observe the movement of few males. Center of their slow movement in one direction will have a babe out there. In a disk it is even easier, wherever there is a cluster of crowd identical to roadside accident, there is a babe out there in the center.

A babe believes “sarv-jan samabhav”. Even if she accompanies her boyfriend (who ends up being her bodyguard), she gives every man (who looks like one) a chance to curse his tailor.

Nari

For Nari hours of a female, one dialogue of Anupam Kher in DDLJ goes very well“ Beta main in ladkiyoon ko aachi tarah se janta huin, Inke paida hone pe inka papa decide karta hai ki inhe kis school main jana hai, ghar mein maa decide karti hai kitni lambi choti bandhni hai aur puri family decide karti hai kiske saath shaadi karni hai” ( Don’t remember the exact dialogue)

Nari -Shakti

During Nari-Shakti Hours of her Life, A female is in hyperactive mode. Newton's third law fails at this moment and any unwarranted action toward her may leave her warmth on your cheeks or may help you in jogging in your attempt to escape flying objects, called chappals by civilization.

Aunty

During Aunty hours, a female talks like lalitaji of Surf fame. She takes it as her prime responsibility in beating the hell out of the shopkeepers for a 50 paisa discount. For a 1000 rupee stuff, she will harass atleast 100 salesman and then she will buy it from the first shop asking him “ Hum to hamesha aapke yahan se hi kharidte hain, kuch to paisa kum kijiye”.

No Demonstrations in front of my flat please.

Gods must be lazy

2007-12-09T11:40:00.000+05:30

I believe God has absolute control over anything or everything. As we all know that absolute power corrupts, I seriously doubt that it is not applicable to Almighty. He has created a most honest bribery system where people pay him to get their things done. Payment can be in the form of money, sweets and even hair at times. You can pay in advance or later once your request is fulfilled. But there is a caveat that if you forget to pay after promising, you have to undergo a lot of suffering. Only Payment does not serve the purpose, you also have to flatter God using different means. Only if he is pleased with your offerings, you have a chance. There are few places where probability of convincing God is high.

Based on the premise that God is all-powerful, I think he should be able to multitask to the extent to control his own creation. If he can control everything, why does he wait and react late. That enforces that Gods must be lazy. That could be a valid reason why people say “ Bhagwan ke ghar mein der hai andher nahi”

Control mechanism designed by God is not effective enough to keep world in order. These are harsh and result in a lot of destruction. Sometimes they remove a whole species from the planet. Either God is not able to justify his own creation or is playing a game with all of us. Tomorrow when he is bored of Homo sapiens, he might think of removing us. So Buckle up guys and offer more bribe else you will be kicked out of this world.

Respecting Diversity

2007-12-09T11:36:00.000+05:30

Almost all the problems in this world converge at a center i.e. Non-willingness to accept diversity. It might not come as promptly as it is. We as humans have tendency to justify ourselves or anything associated with our affiliated group, society, race, religion etc. More than justifying, we do not put effort to respect the differences others have with us. Instead, we try to satisfy our ego by showing that how the way we are/ or do things is superior / has more depth than others’. The process takes a vicious path most of the times. Not liking, hate, trying to prove, going to any extent for proving are various steps in this process.

In today's scenario, we can clearly see this dimension in most of the headlines of International concern. Israel – Philistine, North Korea – South Korea, US – Bin Laden, Environmentalists – Industries, Racism and anything for that matter. The issues mentioned are nothing but fights of existence, autocracy versus democracy, preservation versus change, need to differentiate etc. Problem is not understanding the differing view and trying to impose self-serving view onto others. Any of these issues can be solved provided parties involved are ready to respect a non-concurring perception of situation. We are yet to see paradigm shift in our thinking. Coexistence of diverse ideology is de rigueur since long else the survival of fittest ideology won't take us anywhere but to a world with a lot of unnecessary violence to eliminate the uneliminatable.

For a worthy cause

2007-09-15T14:50:00.000+05:30

Choosing something to write on my blog is as difficult for me as probably it is for a babe to select a dress for her first date. I mean in both the cases, so many thoughts going on at a time, zeroing on one is one hell of a job. But stakes are low in blogging so I don't need to take views from half of my friends/ acquaintance to decide on what to do.

One Fine morning, I got a call from my college senior that I have scrapped some indecent message in the scrapbook of his wife. He was a reasonable man and he understood that somebody has hacked my mail-account . But how unreasonable was the guy who posted some really indecent scraps to so many of my frns. Somehow, I got hold of my account and had to choose a password which was as difficult to remember as it is to pronounce Massachusetts . I tried doing some damage control by sending a mass mail but I really don't know how helpful it was. At once, I was of the view to just shut down my Orkut account. But then I took a clue from our ministers, they never resign even if they are at fault So why should I, when it is not my fault.

I was trying to make a mental sketch of the dude who made me a topic of discussion among people. But the only image I could think of was of Shahrukh Khan of kkkiran fame. You have to be half psycho to do anything like that. It does not make sense to blame a psycho for anything, he needs sympathy. Hey Psycho, If you are reading, please contact me. I am ready to finance your treatment. Anyway, I was planning to donate some money and I would be more than happy to spend on such a worthy cause.

I

2007-07-21T12:16:00.000+05:30

Today( Now it is already over 20 days), I got my first salary, feeling good. also Met few of my good old friends. Had a small get together. There is one thing that has still not changed amongst us that we like each other for the persons we are. For me that is most important thing in a friendship.

In last one month, one word that I hated most is tax and loved most is beer.

Some people should learn to laugh without any pre-conditions. It's not that difficult.

I still love ghazals more than any kind of music. Given a chance, I would like to open a pub with ghazals as a music. I was wary of the idea as I wont get any customers till my idea got reinforced when I met my first assured customer over the mirror.

I dont understand how come somebody have mundane aim of life such as saving money and finds happiness in living a life full of empty glasses of their favourite drinks.

One desire, I have is to dissapear from bangalore without any plan over a weekend and do some real adventure stuff.

Old Wine in New Bottle

2007-07-21T12:10:00.000+05:30

Few months back I got my head shaved to the next best thing > bald. Ya, I mean it looked like leg of a girl with due An-french . I realized the consequence pretty late and by the time my head was ready to serve as a public property with a lot of fingers waiting for Nirvana. My plight was like Ganguly trying to play Shoaib Akhtar.Only Saving grace was that the disc on my head had only stack entry( I mean guys) and cover charges for gals. AAkhirkar, Ijjat ka jo mamla tha. My new aim for life was to have some on-job experience of agriculture. I was taken by surprize when few distant cousins of Anu Malik took it as a style and one of them finally copied it without fail.

Arre copying se yaad aaya, we are taught to call it process reengineering in MBA as we not only copy but poke our nose doing the same thing. Like an assignment of 20 pages will become a summary of 2 page by the time it reaches the last guy. I mean, a saving of 18 important pages to protect trees -> reducing global warming. That is when the vision of an MBA graduates converts into a tele-vision. The guys will use his saved time discussing on the life of human beings in primitve age when there were Peters in england without any peter england and no restriction for anything whatsoever-xyz.

Colors Unlimited

2007-03-01T23:24:00.001+05:30

Thou shall eat in Mess

2007-02-12T15:17:00.000+05:30

(All names changed to maintain confidentiality)

Today, Shrianant would be the happiest soul in Manipal. Why not? At last his clinical trials have passed successfully and soon whole world would be able to taste Papad chapatti. As the name suggests, Papad chapatti is a delicious hybrid of Chapati and Papad.

Not only Shrianant but all the members of our mess will be in the books for all good reasons. After so many years, a new Indian dish on global scene. For me, it is a great feeling to be part of this whole exercise. For last one and half years, my taste buds were delighted by this tasty hybrid of Roti.

One more recipe that our mess has developed is Halua Manchurian. It is India’s answer to the east. It is a Manchurian (Veg, gobhi or any other) that is so soft that it will melt in your mouth on touching your tongue. Your tooth won’t even come to know. I know you are jealous of me. But what can I do if God is biased.

There is one good thing that we are never charged anything extra other than the fixed cost for consuming any of the items reserved for clinical trials. Devana has a philosophy that a country can grow only by research and development. That is why all trial stuff is not at any additional price. And to discourage our routine habits, he charges a nominal price on the traditional food and calls it extra to remind us that we should not deviate from participating in evolution of new recipes.

To be continued…………

Memories at TAPMI

2007-02-10T10:40:00.001+05:30

Credits: Pady

Branded Marriages

2007-02-05T11:12:00.000+05:30

Generally, marriage is a costly affaire and a cost center in accounting terms. I believe there is an immense opportunity of using a marriage for advertising. Today, when media have so much of clutter, it is one space which is still not at all explored.

I am thinking of getting my marriage sponsored (after 2-3 years) by some matrimonial site. Jeevansaathi.com presents Shakun weds XYZ. Sounds crazy Na. But it is a win-win for both parties. My cost center i.e. marriage will become a profit center and Jeevansaathi.com (or any other brand) will get a lot of publicity at very nominal prices. I hope local dailies will cover it and that again will help the brand.

There is a possibility of other sponsorships. Like for food sponsored by some rice brand, Orchestra sponsored by a music company, games sponsored by a gaming site, makeup sponsored by loreal, and photography by Kodak and there are a lot of things that can be sponsored.

Also, a new marriage t-shirt can be released. It can be bought at a nominal price. Accessories related to marriage. I mean marriage will also become a shopping place other than the rituals in which people are least interested.

Disclaimer: This article has nothing to do with me being a bania. This is just a crazy idea.

Blah Blah.......

2007-01-29T01:55:00.001+05:30

It's all crazy stuff. Wrote Sometime back.

All oldies are jealous of the gen-nex guys. In the past, they hardly got an opportunity to observe and enjoy opulence of human anatomy as we do today. I doubt that there is any instrument to measure eyeball movement. Probably it is difficult to device one as oldies eyeball defies all laws of kinetics on seeing a babe.

Indian cricket team is more unpredictable than monsoon. Its performance can be used instead of a binary random function.

What it takes not to perform in a cricket match:

tummy equivalent to a 3 months pregnant
alertness of a person waiting desperately to sleep
tension of an ad shoot next day
Style to justify fielding
Readymade reasons to blame pitch
Paramount importance for time.

Year 2050, Pan Shops are the most attractive business proposition. A recent survey reveals that 80% of pan shops are owned by the people from general category. Panwaalas are hindering India’s quest to achieve equality in its social structure. All political parties are in favor of reservation for pan shops. They are also demanding not opening up this sector for MNCs.

There is perceived danger as the rate of spitting at public places is reducing and entry of foreign companies can further have a negative impact on it. Few parties are taking it in a big way .They never filled any color in their posters and used pan spitters instead. Almost 87,000 people are employed in this activity. FDI in pan sector will endanger the bread, butter and pan of these people.

No offences Meant

Shaks

10+ ideas to propose a girl

2006-11-25T21:13:00.001+05:30

Warning: Resemblance to any character living or dead is purely coincidental. Author does not hold any responsibility whatsoever. Read at your own risk.

Credits: Team Midnight Masala( Heman, K-Arthi -K, Raj"KMC"esh and Myself)

A guy likes a girl and plans to propose her. He goes to consult some of his gurus. Replies are as below:

P1: There could be 4 scenarios. First find out you want to be in which quadrant. Once you are clear it is very easy to act.

P 2: Have a FGD in boys’ hostel and identify the variables. Now make an exploratory questionnaire and ask her to rate these attributes on a scale of 1-5. Now do factor analysis and find out the factors. Prepare a final questionnaire and ask her to fill it up. Do the analysis and you will come to know whether she loves you or not. (And he did it). Then go and propose her. If she tries to say anything, you ask her “Quite Please”

Earlier years I use to propose on behalf of guys, but now due to lack of time and theme system, I have stopped. May be if time permits, I will start it in the future.

P 3: Weather is bad today. It may rain. So wait till sky clears. By the time, Go to page number 412 question number 213 of “Love ke liye kuch bhi karege” authored by love guru and try to understand it. You will get the solution of your problem.

P 4: It’s like this; in G2G (Guy to Girl) context the power rests in the hand of girl. So you ask her to issue a tender. Then you bid your proposal. You never know on the day of bid opening you find other lovers of that girl, waiting in the same garden. So quote your best proposal and pursue it aggressively.

P 5: This girl’s tips I have given in the last class. How to propose her friend, those tips I will teach in the next class. In today’s class you will be presenting BSA on proposal layout, and scheduling.

P 6: By and large, first tell me you want “a” girl or “the” girl. Have you done self exploration? First find out your anchors. Then align these anchors, with your values. Your values do not change so is your MBTI type. See whether your values match with her values.

P 7: What Amma!! All Big words. Tell me the name of the girl amma. I will go and propose (Profound propose amma)

P 8: Please enlighten me. May be it is my ignorance, I don’t know how to propose a girl. I believe because of influence of many western companies we are loosing the indigenous knowledge of proposing girls. Anyway, take her to Kerala and gift her 1 KG of Tapioca, she herself will fall in your arms.

P 9: Proposing a girl is highly technical. Let me codify it for you. First you come out of your shy ego mode. Then use your antenna to send her signals. If her antenna is strong enough, she will catch your signal.

P 10: First ask her WHY Love? Then keep on explaining her till she says yes

P 11: See, the logic of proposing is very simple. But you have to be very very careful. First you do a literature survey, 25 research articles on proposal minimum. You can take help of your friends and acknowledge them but they must contribute significantly and genuinely. Now you prepare a draft copy. Everything should be in one paragraph. No bullet points. Then you explain the conceptual framework of proposal. Then do an empirical analysis on how many proposals were successful and you see the efficiency of that girl whether she reacts instantaneously or she takes some time to react. Look at Beta, sensitivity of that girl. If Beta (sensitivity of that girl) is high then it means girl will fall in love with you (as returns are higher) but you may land up in hospital as risk is also higher and vice versa.

P 12: S e e ..........f I r s t.............. appreciate .............h e r ........then ...............pro..pose

P 13: Love per se means nothing. First you should segment the market, then target a girl and have a solid positioning with clear PODs and POPs.

P 14:

First learn how to propose a girl in French.

Calculate how much environmental waste will be saved because of your love affaire.

Start a program to save environment.

She will be impressed by you and will propose herself.

P 15: Feedback. Keep on asking her for feedback till either she suicides or accepts you.

P16: It’s a question of inter-temporal choice. You do not propose today in the anticipation that you will gain in the future by getting a better girl. But if your future outlook is not very good then you might as well propose today. You might also consider options and swaps also because it is a question of futures.

Shaks in Good mood

Kudlu Falls

2006-10-21T21:28:00.000+05:30

(This is one of the very few veg pics that I can post)

I have also uploaded a video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sG8pQHOvNv8.

Praveen has recently posted description of trip to kudlu. Not much elaborated but then I dont know how could somebody describe a 6 letter word call Heaven.

Will soon try to post detailed version of my trip to Chiplun, Marleshwar and Valveashwar. May god give me enough patience and time.Amen

Life is on

Forgeteos

2006-10-15T15:49:00.000+05:30

In a failed attempt to glamorize my habit of forgetting things I thought forgeteos would be right title for this post. My friends keep on suggesting me numerous possible ways not to forget, but I am more comfortable in forgetting those tecks than probably my innerwear at my friends place. I was always confident that I can’t loose anything special till I forgot my wallet in the pocket of my pent. I hope that I haven’t reached that stage where losing a wallet having some glued notes, is not important for me.

Thanks to my promptness that helped me in entertaining my batch mates with a satirical mail directed towards an unknown thief. But the replies were even more entertaining. (Yet nobody suggested for a marathon to recover that money). On the other hand, I didn’t block my debit/credit cards in a hope that the resultant of my forgetfulness and laziness can be assumed as smartness if an irrational soul stirred by my strong words and moved by my unintentionally torn jeans returns it back. My time table now looked more filled with timing for cursing the thief twice a day first before dinner and second after dinner. I never knew god is listening to my words so carefully, till I was bereft of almost all of the pleasures of life. All this aroused my hidden treasure. Before you start imagining something else let me tell you I am talking about my commonsense. This arousal was shortlived as my commonsense was on casual leave. Amidst all this, I saw a ray of hope in an advertisement of Mentos. Thanks to my smoker friends that I didn’t have to undergo agony of begging in front of temple to buy a Mentos. Mentos supplied required electricity to light up my mind. The ray coming out of my mind struck my purse. My life would have been easier now but thunder short-circuited my dimag again and what more this time, fuse was gone. For last few days, I am waiting desperately for my commonsense to come back and takeover my mind.

Better be a Jackass

2006-09-27T23:46:00.000+05:30

Veeraj says “You should be a jackass to get what you want!!!” I wouldn’t have agreed to it a few years back. But now after wasting so many years on mother earth, I can very well understand the underlying concept, coming from his wisdom.

Sometimes one is conscious of what people will think about him if he does certain things. Self- Image thing comes to mind. He tries to act in a certain way only to address his own comfort with all the people around. This translates into not taking a stance, dilution of passion, hesitation to approach etc. After all this conscious approach he still ends up annoying few people; forget his own ambitions in life. He is no better than an asshole.

It is better to pursue what you want with unmatched passion and no care for what others will think. If you want to pursue something you should be mad after it. For such an approach to things, one has to be fully convinced. It is our inner self that we are not able to convince most of the times. You should have faith in what you want to pursue. There should not be any inhibitions for exploring uncharted spaces.

Once you feel you are convinced, your next job is to induce others. You should have passion to persuade others to favor you. It’s a small and only life and there is no point is bowing down to stubborn outlook of public. You should be a Jackass in short. You should not try to be nice to everybody. By doing this, you will end up nowhere. Here one must is not to make everything an issue of self esteem. Nobody else cares for your self esteem; it’s only you.

Bill Gates has rightly said “The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself.”

Muted Admirations

2006-09-25T16:02:00.001+05:30

At times, you meet few people and become admirer of them. You love doing whatever they do, you understand their actions, you can’t listen anything against them and have all your arguments ready to defend them in public. We all are fan of one or another celebrity but they are out of reach to us in most of the cases.

Things are different when people we like are within our reach. Sometimes they are none other than the people we meet in our day to day life. I could be die hard followers of one of my colleague. Anybody else may not consider him/ her to be attractive enough but then as a matter of fact we all have different tastes. Such closes by contacts are personal most of the times (so called spiritual love, best friends, one night stands etc). Once in a blue moon, you just see few people and want to talk to them. You may get a chance if you are lucky enough or you can create a chance. But there is always a fear that these meetings may change your perception of that person. He or she may be totally different in his/her personal life than what you perceive his/ her to be.

One way to avoid this disappointment is that you don’t approach them. I will call it Muted Admirations. Firstly, you may not have any intention to have any personal linkages. Secondly, you don’t feel need of telling it to others and then justifying your viewpoint. Thirdly and most importantly, you are not ready to break this delusion at any cost.

Till date, I had 2 such admirations. The first one when I was in Ninth standard. This guy use to be my college mate and tuitions mate. I had my own circle of friends and he had his own. I rarely chatted with him but I admired him from the bottom of my heart. I liked every aspect of his personality, from hair style to the way he used to talk. To be frank, I wanted to be just like him. I tried to imitate him. I used to listen a lot of things about him some positive and others negative. The day I tried to befriend R, onwards was painful. Now I came to know how wrong I was. I forgot all those good things about him. I paid for not keeping my admirations muted and maintaining the distance.

My second admiration is from work-ex. In DAKC, I saw this female quite a lot, serendipitously most of the time. I don’t know but I liked everything about her. I made a mistake by telling it to my friends. Then my daily classes started. But I was pretty sure this time that this is more a respect for her than anything else. I didn’t have any intentions for friendship, love or any professional relationship. But, I admired her like anything. To mention a few, I liked her dressing sense, composure, smile and activeness. I never got (and created) any opportunity to talk to her as I was very fussy of not breaking this delusion of mine at any cost.

NOISE n SPIKES

2006-09-09T00:25:00.000+05:30

Listening to “Sach ye hai bekar hame gam hota hai”. Whenever I feel empty and feel like losing all my energy, I take shelter of gazals, my bad times friend.

Today, I am getting a feel of losing something/ someone close to me. Don’t know why?? No reasons as such. My actions are dull, life boring. Every second of this eve is killing me from inside. I am in no mood of sharing it with anybody.

Monotony is killing me. Life is going straight. Nothing great is happening. Everything is as usual.

At times I behave like a guy who is just 16 years old and will do all nonsense and at times I am a mature guy getting ready to become a professional. One side is what I love doing, and what I have to be.

I do not understand why people loose there innocence with the passage of life. Is it really difficult?? I don’t think so.

MBA is commonsense. Can somebody teach you? You can only be informed.

I feel most of the people around me are doing all possible non-sense to get some grades. Very few are really trying to shape their thought process.

I have always believed in reconciling opposites (Eve in temple and night at bar)

I have got so many ideas but no time to write. On top of it my pathetic writing skills. It pains when somebody says you write well because I know It is not the writing, it’s the idea which people generally like.

Never believe in any personality test. They make u believe that you can never do certain things which otherwise you would have done.

Sometimes, disappear in the crowd, go to some place where you don’t know anybody and nobody knows you. It is a strange feeling. It is fun especially when you can’t speak local dialect and place too is scenic.

2006-08-19T21:29:00.000+05:30

Indie Marketing Guru

I Quote

2006-08-14T16:50:00.000+05:30

“It is better to pretend like a fool and fool other rather than trying to be smart and getting out smarted.”

Management in Practice :-)

2006-08-14T16:48:00.000+05:30

I am not sure how much one can learn from books or journals. But yes I know a lot of tricks to cope up with ever increasing pressure of assignments, quizzes and pre- reads. Some of these techniques are awesome and really works.

Rule of 2354: This funda is specifically designed for objective question papers. When ever you are in the midst of a storm called ignorance, use it. First solve all the objective questions you know (if any). Now take the first unanswered Q and mark 2nd choice as answer. For next question, add 3 to 2 and if there is a fifth choice mark it otherwise deduct the number of choices given and whatever comes mark as the right answer. And the process goes on.

Some may doubt but it works. Every time I don’t use 2354. Sometimes I use 2534. It all depends on mood. Believe me it has worked and I have never got an F in any quiz whether I have studied or not.

Two Minutes: It deals with problem of pre reading the case. Few minutes before the class go to any sincere type guy and ask him to explain summary of the case in 5 statements. It hardly takes 2 minutes. Again spend 2 minutes in scanning the headings of the case and reading last paragraph. Now approach a few gentlemen and explain them a “out of the box” interpretation of case. That’s all; next few minutes just listen to them and keep nodding your head. And you are ready for case discussion.

Role Play”Moderator”: This idea is similar to the two minutes but more useful when case is huge and/or has a lot of numbers. First get a place in CC around 9. Open Orkut and start scrapping your friends. In half an hour around 9.30, you will find except you everybody else in CC is working on case. Now it’s action time. Start a dialogue by saying “The case is really difficult”. Your question will evoke various responses and all those sitting there will start a discussion on the case. Whenever you feel discussion is not moving, steer it by giving some points. Here the fruitfulness of discussion is based on your moderating skills. As soon as discussion finishes, comment “When will I do it?? I am yet to start?” and leave CC. ( It works at other places too)

Height of

2006-08-12T22:20:00.000+05:30

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Laziness

Few Interesting Characters

2006-08-03T23:34:00.000+05:30

I am surrounded with so many great souls that I can write a book on each of them. Here a very brief info on some of those (all despos)

I wanna be your Un*******

This guy is a chupa rustam. Some of his contradictory statements are “I don’t like gals” and “I want a girlfriend”. This fucking asshole will go for jogging in the rain in a hope to impress a girl.

Jab bhi koi ladki dekhhoon

This guy has had around 6 accidents in last one year. This fucker is so fortunate that every time he escaped without a single injury. Its other thing that now his vehicle is no better than a cart. Reason for accidents??? This so called “not interested in girls” type was so engrossed in admiring beautiful kanyas that he forgot that he is driving on wrong side. Interesting part is that recently he had an accident where he got hurt badly and this time there was no girl around.

Lovology mein First, Baaki Sabmei Fail

This guy has conducted more surveys than any Brandscan Project lead can think of. In every 15 days, he will prepare a questionnaire and go to some college. No points for guessing that questionnaire is related to some girls’ product. He is so regular in some colleges that some people think he is a student of that college.

Aaja Meri Gaadi mein Beth Ja

Biggest despo. A fin guru. He openly says “I want a GF desperately”. His timings are all planned. He knows which girl is attending which lecture and when she will be free. His entry and exit in a party are very well planned. Good in befriending girls. But sadly lacks energy/ strategy to convert. Probably, The best business plan he can think of is EFGA(Exclusive for girls Auto). The song he hates most is “ bhaiya mere rakhi ke bandhan ko nibhana”

"We R GR8" Syndrome

2006-08-02T23:21:00.000+05:30

After long time. This post is dumbest( Arrant NONSENSE). A bed time childhood story. but it has many hidden clues within it. I wont tell what and their significance. Kinda Puzzle. Find out on your own. Above all that, it's moral is appealing( atleast to me). I am fed up of meeting such "Gr8" personalities in my life.

Long time ago, there was a village say X. People in that village used to live happily. In that country there was an annual wrestling championship. People from X were regular participant in that competition. Although they never won it, at few occasions they were able to reach semifinals. The competition had many competitors so even reaching semifinal was an award in itself especially when a lot of prestige was associated with this event.

This year wrestlers of X started their preparations quite early. They were aiming to win that competition. Wrestlers had total support of village head. Village head(Y) was a good person. He observed that wrestlers in his village were similar in built and used similar tactics like their counterparts in other villages. Y thought probably his wrestlers are less motivated and emotional training could help them in winning. So he came out with a ruling that all the wrestlers were supposed to gather at the bank of river every Sunday evening. Whole of the village gathered. Y narrated stories of their great ancestors. Wrestlers and villagers felt proud after listening this. Wrestlers were highly motivated.That night, everybody was talking about greatness of their ancestors.

It became routine. Every now and then these motivation sessions were arranged. One day a villager took one of his friends from other village to this meeting. Head of the village greeted him. During the course of meeting, head asked the person from the other village to say something to motivate wrestlers. That person happened to be a veteran wrestler. He started informing them about new techniques in wrestling. Head stopped the veteran and asked him to say something about the greatness of his village instead. The visitor complied to Y and spoke about a range of great thing about the village, its traditions and whatever good he knew. These things continued and whenever there was a guest, he was invited and asked to say something great about the village.

Wrestlers were highly confident of bringing trophy this year. Competition started in the Month of March. This year none of them were able to retain their earlier positions. Whole village was dull. Nobody was ready to accept defeats. Head didn’t come out of his home.

Next day, all villagers met at the same place, same time and started same stories again. They started blaming the wrestling championship officials for their performances. The village in few years time stopped participating in these events. They started their own intra-village championship. Reason " We R Gr8 Syndrome"

Shaks stopped for a while

Animation of Hotel California

2006-07-27T15:23:00.000+05:30

Nice Animation.

http://www.flashlands.com/flash_view.php?id=331

Type of Guys

2006-07-01T20:02:00.000+05:30

I knew 3 types of guys: Saturday Must Shave Type (SMST), Monday Must Shave Types (MMST) and Saturday- Monday Must Shave Types (SMMST) and then I met the fourth types who don’t bother to shave ;-)

Saturday Must Shave Type (SMST): These guys are happening types. Who cares, fuck the world, Let me live my life are the typical phrases of such guys. SMSTs in principal wanna have a new girl on every weekend (sadly laws of economics don’t permit). But still have a modest attempt to impress girls. Although it is too late till they realize, that they were jumping (not dancing) in the party. Generally they will have at least one girl mad after them whom they believe is substandard as per their expectations. SMSTs perceive Study/ Job as a waste of time and if given a chance will change office/ college dress code to never- washed T-shirt, torn jeans and no socks (it neutralizes deodorant effect). Some of these beautiful souls are philanthropist by nature as they use perfumes to the extent that nobody else in the party needs to use any. SMSTs love boasting about their alcohol consuming capacities till they start vomiting.

Monday Must Shave Types (MMST): MMSTs are sincere types. For them Boss/Profs comes next to God. Their targets/ assignments are their life. They can’t think anything else and prefer checking their mails 10 times than going to cafeteria. MMSTs are so formalized that you have to take appointment while they are using next urinal. Life for them starts in morning. Few of these nuts, smile to every female colleague in a hope to shatter their cold blooded image (by default usual male desires). They will forward some mails in order to impress some lady after whom whole office is mad (I pity her mailbox).
They are so enthusiastic to attend office/ college that they are not able to sleep properly. Weekend for them is a hell and they come to office/college on weekends too to the extent possible.

Saturday- Monday Must Shave Types (SMMST): SMMSTs are union of first two except the negatives associated with other type.

Don’t bother to Shave Types (DBST): DBSTs have attained nirvana. Nothing stimulates them other than memories. Life is a pain for them and they pain others by their appearance. They are generally pessimistic. One good thing about DBSTs is that they can be trusted as they don’t have drive to cheat others. They don’t care for girls and cant get away from the passion of using abusive language while talking to gals. They hate these SMST, MMST and SMMST’s to the core. The greatest timepass for 2 DBST’s is to laugh at other types. They got an alien feeling at any high class place and they try to run away from such places. Otherwise they will behave aberrantly and spoil the party by some senseless stuff. Office, parties are not their cup of tea. DBSTs are useful only for nothing.

Shaks on the move

Pain is Life

2006-06-06T14:11:00.000+05:30

I know I am gonna have hard time convincing readers that “Pain is life” is an appropriate title. Some will say “Life is pain” could have been better. But I am totally convinced that current title is better.

We recognize importance of anything when it is not available to us or it is in trouble. It could be money, home, love, an injured finger etc. When we have everything what we expect from life, we live a life of repetition. We struggle to get more out of such a life by squeezing as much happiness as possible out of our present.

There is a period in ones life when he wants to discontinue the repetitiveness. Take a case of a rich guy who has all the facilities of this world and has got caring parents unlike what happens in movies. Due to enough of money, he is not interested in more of it. He moves towards art and wants to lead a peaceful life. Money is a pain for him, not is absolute sense but in relative sense. This pain is what leads his life and he starts experimenting. (I don’t remember who said: first generation goes for knowledge, second money and third art)

The problem is that the period for which a person tries to change his life, from what he has led in parental custody, is generally very small. Sometimes one never gets an opportunity and he lately realizes that he has wasted his life. Following established order is a most usual way in almost all societies. Although it’s not that bad as it seems because it helps in propagation of tacit knowledge from one generation to another. But that will also kill any god given talent of new generations.

Repetition is painful. We all feel that pain but to satisfy ourselves, we start rationalizing our thought process. At the end we find ourselves convinced. Sooner or later many of us realize that we haven’t done anything exceptional in our lives. Why? Reason is simple because we always run from ourselves. We know that we are not doing anything great but we portray our circumstances to rationalize our thinking. That’s how we live. Better we would have lived pain. What’s wrong in acknowledging that I am not doing anything great and feeling the pain of it? If that’s what reality is. Closer to reality better is the future. We, try to run away from truth because, it’s painful. But that’s what life is. Life is pain. My topic was “Pain is life. “ I think better I should accept the defeat of my earlier reasoning. Although it’s painful but having an open mind has helped me to improve it all on my own. That’s the crux.

Vo kahna sir ka "Get Out From the Class"

2006-05-16T23:02:00.000+05:30

In one lecture I was without any reading material and was totally new to the subject. I was prepared to be thrown out of the class but I got a chance. Prof was really cool. He unlike many others understood that throwing a guy out of the class was not a solution. Throughout the lecture, I was busy(for a change) applying my understading of the concepts and got the following " Equation of Learning "

Variables:
LRN = Total Learning one can have in class
PR = Pre reading
MAT = having the material in class
MDEL = Quality of delivery of instructor
I= Individuals (students) ability to comprehend

Relations

Taking PR and MAT as an independent variable and LRN as a dependent variable.
The Equation for class learning will be

LRN = I* PR + b* MAT + c --------------1

In case PR=0 and MAT =0 LRN=c

But in case someone is thrown out of the class

LRN =0

But if he is allowed to sit in the class, in that case

LRN>0,

Here we can introduce 1 more variable
That is MDEL

So LRN becomes

LRN = I*PR + b *MAT + I*MDEL + c -------------------2

Here if PR=0 and MAT =0

It implies LRN = I * MDEL + c

This equation may be true for one time event.

Generally a student is thrown out assuming that second time variable PR and MAT will be 1 and they will contribute positively to the LRN. But other factors are ignored. In this case we need to check whether there is any significant correlation in the LRN and PR/MAT. Prima facie (MDEL * I) seem to be better correlated to the LRN than other variable. One more aspect is important to notice; PR can have limiting effect on I and can limit the total value of I * MDEL.

In such a scenario, expelling someone out of the class may not be the right thing.

A Love Story

2006-05-08T00:15:00.000+05:30

First time in life I tried writing a love story. Even after 4 months, I was not able give it a proper direction. But now, I have got an excellent ending and will complete it one day (don’t know when). I would like to thank my friends who gave their valuable inputs (Sudeepta and Pady). There is an indirect contribution from karthik and Rajesh, a dialogue when Kabir proposes Sanjana. We had a cool discussion on that a long time back. Topic was “Essentials to impress gals” HAHAHAHAHA

Chapter1: Journey of a lifetime

I was standing at Heathrow waiting for my flight. It was 12.15 PM and I still had 4 hours to pass. My Business Meeting was a total disaster and I was not able to clinch the deal for my company. I was very tensed and tired at the same time. I thought of taking some rest and started moving towards rest room. “Excuse me are you an Indian”. I raised my head. A beautiful young lady was standing next to me. I was having severe headache and was in no mood of talking. I nodded positively. She said “You look like a gentleman. Will you please listen to me” The gentleman word did its magic and I stopped on the aisle and asked “What For?” “My name is Sanjana. I am from India.” She was polite in her manners. “Kabir. I am Kabir. What do you want?” I was trying to behave like a rude gentleman. “Actually I forgot my purse in a taxi. I don’t know anybody out here and I got a flight at 4:30 to India.” This statement reminded me of Mumbai. You go to any market and you will find people stating the same reason and asking for money. I was always cautious and never got fooled. Once, a stupid friend of mine gave some money. After that event, he got famous in our friend group as “Daani Baba”.

I put a hand on my purse as if I was checking it’s out there or not. “But why do you need money? Don’t you have your ticket?” I was trying to be sympathetic.
“I have it. But it is something else” She was speaking very slowly, Stressing on each word. “I haven had anything from last 2 hours and I am feeling hungry. Will you pay for me”. She looked genuine to me. May be my long association with a lady of the same name in the past, forced me to help her or It could be because of her beauty. I wasn’t sure but I said” Yes, No problem at all. I started taking my wallet out” “Why don’t you come with me? I am also feeling hungry. If you don’t mind” I thought it was not a bad idea when you had a long time to pass. I took her to Costa. Costa had been my favorite place at Heathrow. She went to the ladies room for some time. In meantime, I was observing the grand ambience. It was nicely decorated. The design was Italian but some touch of French was also evident, in particular the furniture. By now I had forgotten all my tension and tiredness and started enjoying atmosphere. She came back after 10 minutes. I observed her closely for the first time. “Simply Awesome” It came out of my mouth. “What?” she asked. “The ambience” I tried hiding my feelings for her. “Yes, I liked it too. The design on the walls is very attractive.” We ordered tuna mayo, pastries and hot chocolate coffee. As usual, it was an awesome combination. On inquiring, I came to know she was here for a design competition. She was a student of a fashion institute in India and wanted to open her own fashion house. We spent next few hours together. Although, very short time but long enough to befriend someone. In my whole life I always have a strong belief in coincidences. And whenever I have asked god for something desperately, I have got it. Probably that might be the reason; we got our seats next to each other in my journey of lifetime. I was not able to take my eyes out of her. We chatted on sphere of topics started from general, social, political and then personal. She was a chatterbox but whatever she spoke was sensible. She was a nice combination of beauty and brain. I was so happy, when she said she was looking for someone, that I could have jumped out of my seat. I thought I should not waste this opportunity. At the time of landing, I decided to reveal my feelings to her. But there was a fear of rejection. At last, I made up my mind. Our flight reached at 6 AM in the morning. It was cold in Delhi but less than London, off course. No sun light, only fog on the airport and in the backdrop some flying lights. The ambience was not perfect but unique enough for one, not to forget. As soon as the bus dropped us, I took her to the corner of the platform. She asked me “What Kabir?” I said” I don’t know how to sing, dance or play guitar, I don’t know how to play basketball, not a formula 1 maniac” “So what? Are you mad?” I realized that I am doing all that what I am not supposed to. It may be, because of my habit of spoiling things at the right moment. I composed myself to make a point “Hey will you accept me as your lover boy without all those things?” I saw a little smile on her face. We forwarded and hugged each other. She said “I liked the way you proposed me.” I was in Seventh heaven. That’s how a new phase of my life started. Here On I will rewrite

Here on I will rewrite

I reached my apartment at Rohini before the first ray of light. I slept till the afternoon. When I woke up it all looked like a dream? I called her and confirmed it wasn’t a dream. We had our dinner together at Parikrama. I dropped her to home at gurgaon. These meetings continued but meantime I was transferred to Mumbai. Phone was the only medium but I used to go Delhi alternate weekends. I was planning to talk to my parents. But destiny will take such a sharp turn, I never imagined. I called her on that unforgettable evening. Her mother was on the other side. The news from other side was shocking enough for me that my tears started flowing, voice mumbling and hands shaking. “She has got Blood Cancer.” That’s what her mother said. I asked “What? Sanjana. Blood cancer. Does she know”? Her mother started crying on the phone. I tried to console her but of no use. I informed my colleague to take care of my work and to inform the boss. I took next flight to Delhi and was at her home by 9. Whole house was gloomy. She was sleeping on her bad. I saw her face. It was bright like a goddess. Nobody could believe after seeing her that she was a patient of cancer. (To be cont…..)

My room in TAPMI

2006-04-13T19:29:00.000+05:30

Hey all,
See the video of my room, one of the most dirty room. But that's what motivates us to come back to it. We have instructed sweeper not to disturb us. Still he keep on bugging us till we allow him to sweep . And next few days will be unbearable. how the hell one can sleep, watch movie in such a clean room. And then starts a journey to bring it back to chaos. ( And they lived happily thereafter :-)

U can dload it from the following URL.

http://rapidshare.de/files/17903402/room_of_a_bachelor.AVI.html

Shaks as usual on the move

quotes

2006-03-19T23:49:00.000+05:30

Was trying to write something and ended up writing few quotes. Enjoy if you like , crib if don't like. Everything is welcome.

Earning thousands of dollars is not worth till you have a heart to spent millions of dollars.

The greatest time pass is to plan how to pass time.

Stupidity is a property of some elite few which can never be conquered by others.

Love is like a feather which initially floats and settles down with marriage.

If you find a flock following you, then either you are a leader or a fool; may be both.

Don’t fear because even Fear has wings to fly high.

How I (Observing people: An Intuitive Science)

2006-03-18T00:01:00.000+05:30

It all started when I was in 9th standard. I used to see my cousin reading books on face reading as part of her course in psychology. I got fascinated about it. But it is difficult for a dabbler to concentrate on one particular hobby. I tried to read a book but at that time I had many other fascinations to pursue so I left it for future .

One day in engineering, I got Sherlock Homes in my hand (those days reading books were one of my favorite pastime). I was thrilled, the way he used to find out information from smallest of clue. It revitalized my sleeping desire to learn how to get information about others just by observing. Some people said, it is all Bull shit. But I never took note of any such view.

Now my task was to find out how to start. I tried to get some books but thanks to my laziness, I was not able to arrange for even one. But all the best things in world have more than one way to get them. Same with this science . I started practicing with my close friends. It somehow became my habit to observe people closely. In the beginning I failed many time, misjudged many times and some time unexpectedly successful. Time kept on passing and it ingrained into me.

Sometimes it so happened what I said from the current information just came true. This strike rate started increasing. During my job, I started practicing this art. It helped me a lot to tackle people. One of my colleagues always used to ask me my views on any particular incident. These cases used to be a real test of my expertise. I myself was not very confident in the beginning but those few informal talks with my friends helped me a lot. We used to stand in front of food court for sometime and it became my practice ground. We used to observe (I don’t need to tell whom) and I tried to come out explanations for some unusual stuffs. It went on and my practice sessions helped me a lot to improve.

By the time I entered into MBA, I mastered this art of finding out some facts about people just by observing them for some time. But now I have a second mammoth challenge, to get feel of a system, predicting it’s functioning and decisions. Till now I have failed miserably with very less strike rate. Only I can say with surety how a system doesn’t work. But I hope in 6 more months I will learn how to read into an existing system.

It may sound very nice to read about all this. But there is a serious hazard. Things are not always rosey. Sometimes I meet people who don’t think good about me, hate me or want to harm. At times it is difficult to maintain the same distance that I would have kept otherwise. Sometimes I need to behave like a fool, sometimes serious guy and list is endless. But in general, I enjoy. Sometimes things are so funny that you simply fall out of laughing. But when things are touching, it is very difficult to handle the situation because you know what will follow.

Time one takes in reading this mail itself tells many things about the reader. Think about it.

Definition of True Friendship

2006-03-12T23:31:00.000+05:30

A true friend is one who never misses an opportunity to take your ass, always allows you to pay for his dues and loves you so much that never let you do anything useful.

Manipal To Meerut

2006-03-11T00:34:00.000+05:30

Last days I had a gala time at home. But before that my journey to home was equally rewarding. We started from Manipal in evening. I took a bus for pune. We were boozing at the Bus Stand. Suddenly Father of Krish came and we were hardly able to hide beer canes.
Journey to Pune from Manipal is full of scenic beauty. One can see nature at its one of the best forms. It is full of Water bodies, Hills, sea and some country people. Whenever I see all this I have a strong desire to buy a house and to spend whole of my life admiring all this. Our Bus took first break around 6 in the evening. Hey I forgot to tell who all were traveling with me: Pavi, Tanuj, Anshul, Krish and Yudi. No one was in a mood to eat anything. But all of us ended up eating heavy snacks

Morning, I got down at Pune with Pavi, Yudi and Krish. Others continued to Mumbai. Yudi dropped me at Nal stop. Meantime, I tried calling my friends, But those fuc**** were in deep sleep. I somehow reached there flat. I kicked their ass to wake them up. After that, as usual a series of verbal comments and fun. There is one thing common among CEC guys; they can take anybody’s ass in a moment. Only one comment will kill you. I may be exaggerating but still it is true to some extent. Around 9.30, we left for breakfast, went to some place and had some fruits. Paji came up with an idea of eating paratha. After 2,3 restauraunt, we setteled down at kotheshwar( I don’t remember exact name) on F.C. road. Gals around were beautiful. All of them were wearing pinks. May be some pink day in Pune! All six of us had some nice moments there. We had a GRAND Breakfast. We started this concept of grand breakfast with Pankaj, John and Veeraj, when I was in Mumbai. That’s a different story all together.
We came back to flat after some time. By the time, Rahul and Varun joined us. Varun was busy with his Oracle interview. And Rahul went with one of the friend to talk to the parents of his friends G.F. Once again, fundas of Rahul. He took a guitar and started playing. Believe me it was pathetic. Especially when you listen to someone great like Gurmeet’s roomy. That guy played 3 songs, all superb. Talented guitarist, I must say. We had lunch together. I left the place by 3.30 to Mumbai. I had a plan to meet Mumbai friends too. But, I got late. I reached airport at 7.30. I reached Delhi airport at 11.30 PM and home at 3 AM. It was quite a hectic schedule but there was a motivation to meet friends and family.

6 days at home, I only ate, slept, watched match and did nothing else. Met my brother, saw RDB in PVS, and contacted few friends. I tried to taste as many delicacies as I could in those few days. It was a life full of fun peace and masti. But sadly I had to start my journey on Sunday morning. I had classes from Monday. Now as usual classes, assignments and blah blah.

CCC ROCks

2006-02-18T23:51:00.000+05:30

This pic is one of those we took for "update". CCC is Civil Cooperation Committee of TAPMI. In front our senie members Shiv, Rajeshwari and shib. In back row Sulakshana, Nitin, ;-) and Vipul.

my section

2006-02-18T23:44:00.000+05:30

Hey guys, my section in TAPMI. Cool pic Na.....

Religion and Society

2006-02-08T22:33:00.000+05:30

"It has been often said, very truly, that religion is the thing that makes the ordinary man feel extraordinary; it is an equally important truth that religion is the thing that makes the extraordinary man feel ordinary." - Charles Dickens

Religion means different thing to different people. Even the belief of an atheist that God does not exist is itself a manifestation of a strong set of values that leads his life. In a way, he is also following a religion. In a broad sense, religion is a set of values one follows in life. All these values are projected in different ways in different religions. But Motif is same, to guide human being. “It is possible to see that religion does not necessarily have to be involved with shrines, temples, churches, or synagogues. It does not need complex doctrines or clergy. It can be anything to which people devote themselves that fills their lives with meaning.” Britannica Encyclopedia

We can not be sure whether any 2 persons shares the exactly same believes and understanding of their religion. On the other hand there is a possibility that 2 persons of different faiths have a lot of similarity in their idea of God. The point here is that if you have decided, you can find defect even in a beautiful peace of art while with the same eyes; you can find a shabby tool a piece of beauty. Only difference is in the way you look at the things. If we see our religion not alone but with national spirit, we will be overwhelmed by the strength of our society. There is a debate “which among religion and nation is more important”. Such debates have no meaning. Both religion and nationalism can coexist and in fact they reinforce each other. And if they lose synergy, it is a clear indication of decline of that particular society.

Religion does not distinguish on the basis of economic status. Anybody and Everybody can practice religion of his choice. All believe in God in one or other way. Religion gives us strength. How beautiful it is that a man believes in someone whom he has never seen, whom he has never met, whom he follows throughout his life without questioning. A person whom he believes more than himself, shares more than he shares with anyone else. The underlying reason is trust. God don’t gives weightage to your economic condition, your physical appearance, your place of birth. This relationship also has mutual respect. God never asks for anything but still we offer our prayers, wealth etc. Not because there is any compulsion but to show our respect and gratitude.

India is a country of religions. India is the origin land of Hinduism, Jainism and Buddhism. I suspect any other country other than India has people of so many religions practicing their faiths so freely. For a foreigner it is like a beautifully variegated collage. What binds people of different believe together is a feeling of nationalism. Hundred of years of foreign rule (based on divide and rule) has toughened our faith in our religion. Our faith in religion forms a major part of our value system. The value system of all the citizens gives shape to Indian society. And our successful society gives us reason to follow our faiths. It is cyclic process.

Religion is binding force for a society. Whenever our society is on the decline, religion has shown us new ways. From mythical Ram to Ramakrishna, each one of the reformers has reinforced our society with the help of religion. They were the individuals who understood that “religion is the soul of society. Even few people living together can form a society but religion gives it colors to fill.”

In 21st century, when Religion is considered as biggest bottleneck in India’s peaceful atmosphere, let us show that it can be converted into her strength. Imagine, a Christian giving dates to a Muslim for breaking Roja; a Hindu going for Haj and a Muslim visiting temple. Not because they lack faith in their religion but they have an open mind towards the other cult and they want to know more about the other religion. Just imagine a society where ignorance is not bliss. We are open towards each other and learn to respect each other’s views. “Heaven” that would be no less than a heaven.

Now question arises how to make India such a society. Answer is lead by example. Don’t wait for others to come and take the initiative. Don’t think that you are a drop in sea but think you are THE DROP. Grab this golden opportunity. Time is ripe. India is moving towards economic prosperity. Junta does not like religious extremists anymore. Relationships with neighboring countries are improving. Awareness levels are high. Few radical initiatives will act as a trigger to achieve social harmony.

A society without fanatics of different religions would be an ideal society. We should always strive for forming such society and we should not feel satisfied for anything less than that. Task is not easy. It requires a lot of dedication and effort. As the younger generation, it is our responsibility to take the burden of the task and revolutionize the whole India. Let us come out of receptive mode of thinking and doing. I am not asking to change the world; I am asking you to change yourself. The day you change yourself, you will find the whole world around you changed. The great things comes from inside to outside, not the vice versa. Take the example of air, when it flows outside to inside, it is a cyclone: while when the same air flows inside to outside it makes weather pleasant.

India has always shown ways to the world in its golden past. Let us this time show the world a society whose foundation is religious harmony and force them to ponder on to the narrowness of their thoughts. Let us come together and start revolutionizing ourselves to create a society based on religious harmony and love.

Sick of Discipline

2006-02-03T22:48:00.000+05:30

“We are faced with the paradoxical fact that education has become one of the chief obstacles to intelligence and freedom of thought.” Bertrand Russell

6 months after joining, I feel like run away from this place. So much of discipline, I cant simply live in. In my school days I never attended more than first half of day. College it was no better. But in last 7 months 100% attendance. Unbelievable!!. A long list of unspoken/spoken Do's and Don’ts to follow. No freedom to decide what is good for me what is not. Am I a child? There may be good intentions behind all these rules but for me they are having negative impact. I feel like tied up and not able to perform to my fullest potential. Academically worst phase of my life is on.

Classes apart, daily quiz, presentations and assignment has made me sick and I am desperately looking to go home. After 22 more days, I will at my home after 8 months. I have already given a wish list to my sis and parents. Hope this break will give me a much needed boost.

A fair play

2006-01-20T22:15:00.000+05:30

People have preferences for various things for various reasons. The differentiating factor in human beings is their behavior except the anatomy. How their behavior differs is a resultant of their differing social setups. As human being is an irrational social animal, he lives with commonly accepted ideas and beliefs of the society he belongs to. But when the same human being comes out of his social well, he finds it difficult to adjust in a different society. He becomes hesitant to others culture and always keeps his back towards the new setups. To justify his claim he starts to rationalize his thinking. His thinking is reflected in his actions and hence prejudice. He has a skew view towards other groups; sometime knowingly and sometime unknowingly.
Day in and day out, we find ourselves surrounded with such prejudiced souls. The number of people with biases in one or more area is phenomenal and none of us can claim in totality of not being such a soul. It is one of the most dangerous disease human beings are suffering from.

Is there any possibility of normalizing unfairness through a completely rational system?

Everyone wants to listen to his own voice

2006-01-07T20:31:00.000+05:30

Everyone wants to listen to his own voice
One of the best phrases, I have encountered in my life. It took me only 3 minutes to appreciate the phrase verbally but 3 years to realize its practical value in today’s ERA OF PREJUDICE.

In today’s era when individualism is touching new heights, everyone is engaged in proving others that what he thinks may not be correct but it is right. We can take it as an unwanted parcel came with the modernization of India. Now there is a conviction, self belief. One thinks that his thought process is absolutely right and there is no need to pay heeds to others view. People (Gen Nex) lack other orientation. Their approach is if I am Happy everyone is Happy. If people around me suffer let them. At the end of the day I should be happy. There is a serious flaw in this thinking. How long would you be able to derive benefit out of others without bothering about them? Only till the point others has respect for your views and ideas. The day you meet your ideological replica, you will be under tremendous stress. As the number of individualistic characters in society increases, you will have more probability of not feeling well out of meeting such people. In a way, you are not only troubling others but you are buying stress for yourself.

From economy prospective when consumerism is driven solely by the feelings of consumers, a manager not having other orientation as his inherent strength can not do justice to his job. One of the major reason for the failure of an economic entity is that it tries to drive the market as it wants, do not change itself as market wants. All these things points out that there is a strong need for caring others. Self confinement makes your thinking narrow. In an envisaged integrated world, can we think of individuals who are separate entity and are ideological disarray? No we can’t. Either our dream would remain dream forever or the individuals with self centered approach will cease to exist. Whatever happens, we will see a completely new society in years to come.

I would like to end this article by the following words

Caring others means catering yourself

Reference :
Saswata Dey, Who introduced me to the title phrase. I am not sure but it could be his brainchild.

Difference in absolute and relative grading

2005-12-21T23:07:00.000+05:30

In the absoloute grading u ask ur friends" study otherwise you will fail " In relative you say " Dont study otherwise I will fail?"

2005-11-27T20:59:00.000+05:30

This link is simply superb. Use speakers while going through it. www.thedreammovie.com is the link. really inspiring.....

2005-11-23T16:01:00.000+05:30

Just like business cycle where start, growth, maturity and decline are the phases, there is group cycle. wondering what is this group cycle. When many people with diverse backgrounds, tastes and aspiration meet and form a group, the group follows the following cycle:

I'll do it: They all do not accept the views of others and want others to agree upon their views. For sake of it they are ready to handle the whole assignment/ Project on their own.
This stage remains for very short period.

You'll do it: The second stage of group is very interesting. Everyone says the same statement but for different reasons

>> Few guys who got exhausted after first few days of extra enthu performance
>> Those who were blamed earlier for dismal performance of the group. They can further be subdivided
a> one who have realized their mistakes (very few)
b> those who have” Now I see how will u do it" in back of their mind
>> Those that lacks self confidence and want to live in the shadow of others
>> Last but not the least our lazy bone and royal kings.

We'll do it: By this stage, everyone has understood that they are in the same boat. Now they got divided in small groups for assignments and projects and try to live with the differences.

Who'll do it: Nobody is interested; nobody wants to talk to anyone. They don't even want to see the face of each other. (Dilemma: who will do the assignment)? The scapegoat is generally a studious type of guy who loves his grades more than anything else. If there is no such person in the group than that group survives on the mercy of Profs.

2005-11-05T22:06:00.000+05:30

From few days I am observing one thing. There is always mob in front of devil board (our grade board in front of class. for my convenience I will call it Hahakar). Hahakar has got more audience in Tapmi than a matinee show viewers. You will find some stupids ( Hahakaris) always standing over there. Sometimes it seems like this that Hahakar is the only place except class where they can be found out in the college. There is a totally unique breed of such people. It looks like they are doing PhD on grades distribution. Moreover, Hahakaris are not at all selfish. They keep track of everyone's grade. They always encourages people who has got grades less than them (Pat themselves) and curses themselves when they meet anyone who has got more grades. Most of them would be absent from all the events which are ungraded and need some mind scratching. A hahakari would typically ask 10-30 people their grades in a day.

2005-11-01T23:30:00.000+05:30

One of my favourite lyrics. I like it very much. A classic . It's every line somewhere touches me very deeply.

hazaaron Khvaahishen aisii ki har Khvaaish pe dam nikale bahut nikale mere armaaN lekin phir bhii kam nikale
nikalanaa Khuld se aadam kaa sunate aaye hain lekin bahut beaabaruu hokar tere kuuche se ham nikale
muhabbat men nahiin hai farq jiine aur marane kaa usii ko dekh kar jiite hain jis kaafir pe dam nikale
Khudaa ke vaaste pardaa na kaabe se uThaa zaalim Kahiin aisaa na ho yaaN bhii vahii kaafir sanam nikale
KahaaN maiKhaane ka daravaazaa 'Ghalib' aur kahaaN vaaiz par itanaa jaanate hain kal vo jaataa thaa ke ham nikale

Shaks Unlimited

2005-10-24T19:26:00.000+05:30

Now, when I am fed up of writing on paper, Google Blog seems to me a perfect option to share my thoughts, feelings and happenings. Life in Tapmi is getting tougher day by day. Theme 5 is going to start. Supposedly, the toughest theme. But I have learnt to live with continuous pressure without losing my smile.